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Marriage Counselling In A Thriving Relationship

Written by Syra Salam

Life is not a bed of roses, and marriages are not fairy tale either. The sooner one realizes the practical reality of life, the easier it becomes to accept the marital life. Like any other bond, married couples do have their bittersweet share of life.  There have been occasions when you could not take your eyes off your spouse, and similarly times when you both were arguing over some trivial matters. The ideal solution calls to move on. However, there might be a grievous situation when the marriage might be on the brink of a breakup. Before things go wrong, we recommend that couples seek the support of a third party. And this is where the role of marriage counselling comes.

What is marriage counselling?

Marriage counselling, also commonly known as couples therapy, is a form of therapy that centres on families and partnerships. Marriage therapy is a supportive environment for partners to work it out and vent about what’s bothering them.

When it comes to fixing marital issues, communication is crucial, and marriage therapy is one of the easiest ways to develop skills in communication, establish shared understandings, and work out how to go on as a pair — or end a marriage peacefully if that is the Couple’s best option.

If you’re not convinced, consider the following five compelling reasons why marriage counselling is a good idea.

Unbiased advice for all parties

Over the years, several leading marriage counsellors have worked with a wide variety of relationship problems. Your professional psychologist will consult on how to enhance intimacy after allowing you and your wife the chance to communicate honestly. When conversation alone isn’t enough, then the better counsellors go a little further.

Counsellors offer numerous advice to strengthen partnerships using a blend of impartial logic and a vast wealth of practice. They will have constructive advice on how to proceed on a marriage’s trouble points, but it will be up to the pair to translate the advice into practice at home. Couples will benefit significantly from the recommendation because it is objective and considers all points of view.

If you’re not convinced, consider the following five compelling reasons why marriage counselling is a good idea.

Avoiding Divorce at the First Place

Couples often have opposing agendas. For example, one party needs to divorce or break up, and the other wants to keep the Couple together. Discernment counselling” will help couples determine whether to seek a divorce or what needs to change whether they continue to be together.

If it becomes clear that this isn’t a marriage that will succeed, counselling could be a viable option for a less acrimonious breakup. Minor misunderstandings and not letting go have a lot to do with protracted, chaotic divorce. If a couple can process “how did it happen in the first place?” and move beyond accusing each other, they can move forward in a more mature manner that is less damaging to everyone involved.

A discussion forum on infidelity and the rebuilding of confidence

If you’ve been disloyal or come near, the mere implication of cheating will end a marriage on its own. Betrayed feelings will become worse over time, to the point that credibility is irreversibly compromised. The confidence can only be restored by being painfully frank about these feelings.

Infidelity is addressed head-on in marriage counselling without bias or judgment. The goal is to get beyond it, which is why counsellors strive to get it to the surface. Infidelity shatters confidence in a relationship, and therapy focuses on reestablishing the trust one step at a time.

A safe setting for ethics

Being frank about your feelings with your partner in the boundaries of your home — which is sometimes the front line for marriage — isn’t always simple. If conveyed in the wrong context, brutal honesty will trigger severe emotional pain, rage, and conflict. One of the key reasons people seek marital therapy is a sense of comfort in numbers when having an open and frank conversation.

Counselling is a comfortable space where no one is ever judged. You’ll only be able to get past your problems if you’re always honest with each other — but being open with your innermost emotions isn’t always straightforward when you’re just the two of you.

A chance to release resentment and frustration

Allowing feelings of disappointment, annoyance, and resentment to fester is one of the leading causes of marital breakdown. These feelings are poisonous to a relationship, poisoning any part of it. Unfortunately, these feelings also worsen over time, to the point that they begin to poison every aspect of your life.

According to John Gottman, a leading marital counsellor, six relationship problems predict divorce. Since hearing couples fighting in his lab, he coined the term “The Four Horsemen” to describe one problem. He coined this phrase to explain the four factors that contribute to negativity and anger. Criticism, disdain, defensiveness, and stonewalling are Gottman’s four horsemen, and they can all be fatal to a marriage.

Is marriage counselling effective?

Therapy can be beneficial. It’s not about pointing fingers — who did what or who is to apologize, contrary to popular belief. But, on the other hand, Couple’s counselling teaches you how to communicate and speak for what you desire.

Marriage therapy statistics are encouraging. According to research, 98 percent of couples who seek marriage counselling rate their therapists as “excellent” or “healthy.” Ninety percent of couples who try marital therapy say their mental health improves, and two-thirds say their physical condition strengthens.

And perhaps the most interesting figure of all: Following marital therapy, up to three-quarters of couple’s report that their marriages have improved.

Final words

Marriage, like everything else, necessarily requires effort and upkeep. And certain couples, marital counselling is just what they need to get past their difficulties to stay together. Marriage therapy isn’t always simple, particularly at first, but it’s worth it for your marriage.

Any strained relationship will be saved if the partners in a marriage are willing to go for counselling. However, this is a long process with no easy fixes. All parties must be willing to put in the effort and, where possible, seek expert advice and guidance.

Special Matrimony:  

Special Matrimony aspires to unite lovers of all kinds. Marriage is a beautiful connection between two people and, we believe that it’s a sequence that should be made memorable. Our unique match-making platform aspires to connect people from around the world. Furthermore, we aim to connect people with certain conditions such; as autism, deafness, and countless more. Here at Special Matrimony, we believe in three things: Love, Harmony and, Joy.  For further information, be sure to contact us.

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